THE NIGHT THE FLOOR FELL IN
(Ken Wheeley)
Billy Cotton & His Band
V. Alan Breeze and Chorus




Charlie and his missus were a happy-go-lucky pair
They threw a party every Saturday night
With all of their relations, like the league of nations there
It nearly always ended in a fight
But there was one occasion on which they did agree
And then they brought the house down with their joviality


They danced the boomps-a-daisy
And then the palais glide
They did the hokey-cokey
And laughed until they cried
And when they had a knees-up
And everyone joined in
The only night they never fell out
The blinkin’ floor fell in.


Oh my, it wasn’t half a do
With everybody happy 
Though they were black and blue
Oh my, it really was a sin
The only night they never fell out
The night the floor fell in.


Now Mrs. Brown was bending
To button up her shoe
Just then the carpet parted 
And she went sailing through
They heard her saying after
She put her teeth back in
“The only time they ever fell out
The blinkin’ floor fell in”


Oh my, it wasn’t half a do
With everybody happy 
Though they were black and blue
Oh my, it really was a sin
The only night they never fell out
The night the floor fell in.


An old cowpoke was sleeping
Down in the room below
A-dreamin’ of the dogies
And cows he used to know
And then the ceiling opened
He got an awful fright
He said, “Them riders in the sky
Is ridin’ low tonight.”


Oh my, it wasn’t half a do
With everybody happy 
Though they were black and blue
Oh my, it really was a sin
The only night they never fell out
The night the floor fell in.


Now Charlie learnt his lesson
Like all good men and true
When he was at a party
He knew just what to do
If anyone was fighting
He covered up his chin
And for a dance he padded his pants
In case the floor fell in.


Oh my, it wasn’t half a do
With everybody happy 
Though they were black and blue
Oh my, it really was a sin
The only night they never fell out
I wondered what all the noise was about
The only night they never fell out
The night the floor fell in.










(Contributed by Bill Huntley - September 2006)