ENDICOTT
August Darnell

Kid Creole and the Coconuts


Endicott's up by five o'clock, 
Endicott's givin' all he got.
Endicott's job is 6 to 9,
But Endicott's home by 9:05.
Endicott helps to cook the steak, 
Endicott helps to wash the plates.
Endicott puts the kids to bed, 
Endicott reads a book to them.

(Chorus) Why can't you be like Endicott?

Endicott loves Tribena so, 
Endicott puts her on a pedestal.
Endicott's wish is her command,
But Endicott don't make no demands.
Endicott's always back in time, 
Endicott's not the cheating kind.
Endicott's full of compliment, 
Endicott's such a gentleman.

(Chorus) Why can't you be like Endicott?

'Cause I'm free, free of made-to-order liabilities.
Thank God I'm free, 'cause it's hard enough for me
To take care of me.

Endicott's carrying a heavy load; 
Endicott never really ever moans.
Endicott's not
But Endicott pays the bills on time.
Endicott's got ideas and plans; 
Endicott's what you call a real man.
Endicott always will provide,
'Cause Endicott is the family type.

(Chorus) Why can't you be like Endicott?

'Cause I'm free, 
Freer than a pirate on a frigate out at sea.
Thank God I'm free,
Driftin' all around just like a tumbleweed.

Maybe I need someone, someone who isn't undone.
Maybe an older woman will tolerate me;
Maybe that certain someone older and wiser woman,
Maybe the perfect someone to satisfy me.

Endicott keeps his body clean, 
Endicott don't use nicotine.
Endicott don't drink alcohol, 
Endicott uses no drugs at all.
Endicott don't eat any sweet, 
Endicott don't eat piggie feet.
Endicott's frame is mighty strong, 
Endicott makes love hard and strong.

(Chorus) Why can't you be like Endicott?

Endicott loves Tribena so, 
Endicott walks her to the sto'.
Endicott likes to hold her hand, 
Endicott's proud to be her man.
Endicott stands for decency, 
Endicott means formality.
Endicott's the epitome, 
Endicott stands for quality.



(Contributed by Lou Rugani - The Music of the Stars (WLIP) - January 2014)